Sorry, I forgot to update you on my big “parent” day at Olivia’s preschool. Let me just say that I wish I could go to preschool too. No wonder she can’t wait to get up and go every Monday, Wednesday and Friday!
We started with a parent meeting with the teachers, (the kids were doing their normal thing with substitute teachers). They gave us a lot of information, including a handy little sheet that lets us know the daily schedule. No longer will I look at the clock and wonder “Gee, what’s Olivia doing now?”
After our meeting we were able to accompany the children on the sand yard, where a handful of the kids (including Olivia) took their shoes and socks off and proceeded to have a blast. Olivia and one of her classmates made me (and the classmate’s mama) “pumpkin pies” and Olivia kept shouting “follow me!” and showing me all of the fun things the yard has (swings! slides! a kitchen set! tunnels! a playhouse! mud!) Olivia had her toes wiggling in the mud and her hands in the dirt. However, during all of this “play” I noticed one very glaring thing. She interacts with other kids, but the bulk of her playing is what is considered “Parallel Play”.
Of course, in hindsight, this is totally normal, but at the time, I saw other kids playing “superhero” or some other variation of pretend play in groups of 3 or so, and they would whiz by Olivia, her watching, but not really joining in. I came to find out that Olivia is one of the youngest in her class, many of the kids are turning five right now, where Olivia will only be 4 in two weeks (No, I can’t believe it).
Apparently, her classroom is what they are calling a “bonus year” room, because so many of the students had later birthdays and their parents decided to keep them in for one more year. It wasn’t until after two other moms mentioned their sons were doing the same type of parallel play and they are all right around Olivia’s age (not yet four, or just turning four) that I started feeling somewhat better. It still made me feel slightly weepy to see Olivia, sitting solo, happily playing while the other kids just ran around and played together. The teacher assured me that it was completely normal and she was fine, and a LOT can happen in 9 months. More than likely she will start interacting more and more. Plus, it was only the second full week of preschool.
What can I say? I’m a worry-wart.
The teachers mentioned having more play dates with other children her age, which is what I have tried to do since day one, but hopefully now that I’m getting to know more of the moms I can make that happen.
Another thing I noticed (but was not surprised by) was that as Olivia was flitting around the yard, showing me all the different things, she suddenly stopped in her tracks, ran over to a little table they have outside with puzzles and a basket of books. She sat down and just dug into the books. The teacher mentioned that if the books are there, that’s where Olivia will be and they have taken to trying to put the books away before she gets to the yard because they are trying to encourage her to play. The teacher stated “if they are there, she goes right to them, but if they aren’t, she doesn’t notice or ask, she just does other things–books are definitely her comfort zone.”
When I relayed that to my mom, she said “is that supposed to be good or bad? I could never figure that out when they would say that about you.” I told her it wasn’t good OR bad, it just was. Lots of kids have blankets or teddy bears or other comfort items, Olivia (and I suppose at one time) I, have books. When books are around and within reach, all is right with the world, and we are in our element.
As proud as it makes me that she loves books, I am happy to know they are trying to help her interact more, have fun, and just play.
During activity time, where they have a few different tables open with different projects for the children (play doh, drawing, art projects, etc.) They had “dot art” for the kids to do. After TWO final notice announcements, Olivia decided she wanted to do dot art. Basically dot art are those little blotter tubes (think: bingo card markers) that they dot on paper to make pictures, or just dots. Well, Olivia was intent on using them like markers. She couldn’t just make dots, she had to make a picture. The teacher commented that “Everything Olivia does is purposeful.” Which, I had never thought about it before, but she’s right. She doesn’t just scribble, she has to draw “something” (even if she does do a scribble, she tells me that it is an *insert made-up word here*) She needs a purpose in what she does, because, why bother (in her mind, it seems)?
Bill is a lot like that, in that he doesn’t just do stuff to do it. My mom says that I am the same way, as I always need an excuse or a reason to do whatever it is I want to do. However, with me, it seems as if I make up reasons to do something I want to do, even if they are ridiculous and far-reaching. Me “wanting” never seems good enough a reason (in my own mind). “I’ll be a better *mom, wife, photographer, writer, person, etc.* if I get this product.” Whereas Bill is just someone who wouldn’t do something because someone told him to do it–he would research and figure out if it was something he really wanted to do. Basically, Bill is cautious and thoughtful before doing things, and I need an excuse or a reason to justify the things I do. Olivia kind of falls somewhere in the middle (or so it seems right now).
I suppose we could all use a little less purpose sometimes, so we’ll work on that.
I must say that I am incredibly impressed with the amount of things that Olivia does in her three hours every M-W-F; she loves it and is happy there. I’m starting to meet some of the other moms, and I think there are a few that seem pretty cool. Maybe by the end of the year we’ll both make long-term friends.
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